the hardest part about being alone
or without “that person”
when i did.
i have had a great many
in my life.
that really wanted me.
they couldn’t stop thinking about me
i’ve had them call
i’ve been surprised by them.
i have been adored
i’ve had men make love to me and mean it.
i know exactly what i am missing.
something happened along the way.
i couldn’t get a decent date
relationship had fallen out of fashion.
both sexes began to retreat. detach. or become apathetic
soon it was either lets be friends with benefits.
or we can be friends.
or more so,
lets just get laid.
i tried that on.
the sex only gig.
a flurry of men
for fuck sake
and nothing more.
what an empty and shallow thing.
what a waste of my great mind, my wild laugh and my creative brilliance.
and then, recent life happened
and i broke.
if someone approached me now for sex? lusted for me?
i couldn’t do it.
i wouldn’t even want to
remembering when someone wanted me?
breaks my heart into a million pieces